A Hunger For Perfection
by MattHardy-And-AmyDumas-4eva
Summary: *FINISHED* One joking comment from her friends and Amy’s life changes drastically. It’s only when one moment goes completely wrong that Matt realises she needs help. But is she willing to help herself?
1. Chapter 1

Title: A Hunger For Perfection-Chapter 1.  
  
Author: Carly.  
  
Disclaimer: Amy, Matt, Jeff and the rest of the wrestlers own themselves.  
  
Summary: One joking comment from her friends and Amy's life changes drastically. It's only when one moment goes completely wrong that Matt realises she needs help. But, is she willing to help herself?  
  
  
  
No matter who you are, you can't help but feel insecure about your appearance. All girls go through a phase in their life, wondering what's wrong with them. But the main worry is weight. 'Do I look fat in this?' is the regular questions girls ask. It's only normal to feel this way and affects you at all ages. But you just have to be careful not to let your insecurities go too far to take over your life. But sometimes, you lose control without even realising it.  
  
Amy Dumas was out with some friends. They had gone for a meal at a nearby restaurant before going to a club. Although she was enjoying herself, she felt a bit fatter than normal as she was near her period. It hadn't helped that she'd had loads to eat throughout the day but she'd been craving sweet things all the time. She was wearing a tight fitted top as well, so she thought her stomach was visibly huge to everyone in attendance at the club. In order to drown her sorrows, she started drinking quite a bit. Everyone else was dancing until they returned to the bar to Amy. Matt wrapped his arms around her waist, patting her stomach.  
  
"Putting on a bit of weight, aren't we Ames?" he joked.  
  
"Yeah, or your pants are three sizes too small," Jeff added sniggered. Adam and Jay laughed along with them. Amy forced a smile and tried to hold back the tears. They soon changed the subject but they still didn't notice the hurt filled in her eyes. She folded her arms in front of her stomach, trying to hold the 'fat' in. Deep down, she knew she wasn't fat but their comments still got to her. 'If they said something, who knows what everyone else is thinking?' she thought, worrying herself more. Normally, she didn't care about people's opinions of her but tonight she seemed to, wondering if people noticed her weight. She sat with her at the table, arms still crossed in front of her. They all questioned her as to why she was being so quiet but Amy just gave a mumble in reply and went to the bathroom. As she was passing everyone, all she saw was men drooling over tall, thin girls. Sighing, she entered the bathroom and hid in one of the stalls. The tears that threatened to fall earlier were now slipping down her cheeks. She curled into a ball and rested her head on her knees. Reapplying her makeup, she returned to the table and grabbed her bag.  
  
"Guys, I'm not feeling too good," Amy said, proceeding to leave.  
  
"Hang on Ames, I'll walk back to the hotel with you," Matt replied, grabbing his jacket and standing up.  
  
"No it's ok. I'd rather go alone." Not giving him a chance to say anything more, she left the club. Walking home, all she thought about was her weight and resolutions to lose some. Stopping at a shop on her way, she picked up a magazine full of different diets to try. As soon as she got to her room at the hotel, she started looking through the magazine to find a suitable diet she could try in order to lose weight. Wondering how much she had to lose, she went to the bathroom and weighed herself. A hundred and thirty five pounds. Amy looked in the mirror and lifted her top up. She tried breathing in and out to see how flat she'd like her abdomen to be. Tears pricked at her eyes again, negative thoughts about her appearance. There was a knock at the door and Matt entered. He called out for Amy and found her in the bathroom, brushing her teeth. She came out, kissed him on the cheek then got her t-shirt and shorts to go to bed. It was then she realised that they would sharing a bed and she certainly didn't want him to cuddle up to her like normal in case he felt her 'pudginess'. As they were in bed, Amy made sure to keep to herself.  
  
"Ames, what was wrong last night? You never usually sleep so much to the side so that you nearly fall off!" he quipped, as they ate breakfast the next morning.  
  
"I just didn't want you to catch my cold. I've already lost my appetite," she answered, pushing her untouched plate away. Matt raised his eyebrows at her. "The guys are coming. I'm going back to the room for a minute. See you later." With that said, she leapt from her seat and retreated back to her room. While there, she was in the bathroom, examining her stomach. Even though it was just water retention from periods, Amy thought otherwise. Realising that she needed to get to the arena, she grabbed her jacket and drove there alone. She could see some of the other wrestlers being hounded by fans for autographs, including Matt and Jeff. Sighing, she parked the car then got out and joined her friends. The fans there were thrusting pieces of paper and photos for her to sign. For a moment, she forgot about her insecurities and enjoyed the times with her adoring fans. After a while, the security guards escorted them inside. They found their locker room and dumped their bags on the floor. No sooner had they sat down that a backstage helper came in to hand them their scripts. The trio groaned but reluctantly looked through it.  
  
"Hey, you have a tag team bra and panties match at Invasion, Amy," Matt informed her.  
  
"Cool," she replied, picking up her on script to see whom else who taking part. 'Great,' Amy thought. 'Stacey Keibler and Torrie Wilson. Stacey is like a damn stick.' She tried to make it sound as through she was excited about the match. But inside she was screaming. More than likely, she'd at least have her top ripped off…and that meant people seeing her stomach. Right then, she decided to go on a fasting diet. It would be easy, just eat a lot less that normal…virtually nothing in other words. And was going to start the next day. She would have six weeks until the Invasion Pay-Per-View in July. Besides, it would only be for a few weeks until she reached her target weight. It wouldn't be as if she was going turn anorexic… 


	2. Chapter 2

Title: A Hunger For Perfection-Chapter 2.  
  
Author: Carly.  
  
Disclaimer: Amy, Matt, Jeff and the rest of the wrestlers own themselves.  
  
  
  
It was a new week and a new day to start the diet. Amy woke up and had a quick shower. After drying her hair, she was careful to pick out an outfit. In the end, she pulled on a pair of shorts and a loosely fitting Team Extreme t-shirt. She was going to the gym for an hour to have a good workout. It was only eight o'clock and she usually didn't get up until ten or eleven but she needed to start getting up in earlier in the morning to have a good exercise. And she knew it would be pretty empty at this time of the morning. The other superstars and wrestlers would be asleep and the other people staying wouldn't necessarily be interested in exercising.  
  
She quickly did some stretches then made her way to the gym. After tying her hair back into a ponytail when she got there, Amy climbed onto the treadmill and started jogging. She had set the timer for ten minutes. She tried to forget the fat that she was exhausted through lack of sleep and carried on running, increasing the speed after each minute. After the ten minutes were up, she started doing fifty sit ups, then lifted the weights. Within the hour, she had been on almost every exercise machine there. Her metabolism was faster now so she went back to the room to change and have breakfast. Matt was already up and asked where she been. Lying, Amy said that she couldn't sleep so went for a quick workout. She had another wash then changed once again for breakfast. Her, Matt and Jeff had a signing at twelve so she wouldn't able to exercise. Then again, it meant she wouldn't have to have lunch.  
  
They walked to the hotel restaurant talking about their plans for the day. Luckily, because they had wrestling practise, it meant she could exercise. As they entered the room, they saw Jeff, Adam, Jay and Trish at one of the tables. Amy went to the table where the food had been placed and just took a cereal bar. Usually, she had a full breakfast like Matt but she had started her diet today so there was no way she was going to have a full breakfast. As they joined their friends, they were all surprised to see Amy eating just an apple but before they could question her, she went to get some water. While getting a drink, she bumped into some other friends and began talking to them. She was so caught up in their conversation that she didn't realise Matt and Jeff approach her. They poked her in the ribs, startling her. She whipped around and found the two Hardy brothers there, huge smiles on their faces.  
  
"You ready to go?" Jeff asked. "We need to get to the signing."  
  
"Yeah, let me just get a bottle of water from the vending machine at reception area," she answered as they made their way down. Matt went to put his arm around her waist but she hurried along not him to feel her stomach. This seemed to confuse him slightly. Though they weren't dating, they were still the best of friends. He decided to question her later about the matter. As watched as she got her usual bottle of water…but only got skittles for Jeff and nothing for herself. She always had a bag of cookies for throughout the day. As they were in the car driving to their destination, Amy was in the back scribbling something in her notebook. They got to the mall where they were doing to the autograph signing and tried pushing through the queue of mainly teenagers there just for the extreme trio. The moment they caught site of Matt, Jeff and Amy, they all started screaming and wound up. The guard led them to their seats then left them to it. They knew they were in for a long time to get through everyone, they always were. Amy smiled at this, knowing there was no point in having lunch, as they wouldn't be finished until 2.30pm at the earliest.  
  
"Can we talk later?" Matt asked in a whisper, leaning closer to her. Amy turned to him and nodded, but also worried that he started noticing about her insecurities.  
  
"Are you two really dating?" a young girl asked, getting excited.  
  
"No, we're just best friends," Amy replied, smiling then signing the picture. It from a Team Xtreme photo shoot a few weeks previous. She had worn a belly top that day and admittedly, looked quite thin. But now, she felt like a heavily pregnant elephant! She handed the photo back with a forced smile. Her stomach rumbled slightly as she hadn't had much for breakfast. As planned, they stayed longer than expected. It was three o'clock by the time they got to the last few fans. Afterwards, they decided to go around the mall for a while. Normally, Amy went to get some clothes but she didn't want to this time. Matt knew something was definitely up. Jeff was somewhat distracted with relationship problems so he didn't really notice. They went to a café for something to eat, but she clamed to have lost her appetite so she just had a diet coke. Matt eyed her suspiciously as he ate his burger. He was so sure he heard her stomach rumbling earlier.  
  
"Ames, do you want some of my burger?" he offered pointing to his food, already knowing her answer.  
  
"Umm, no thanks. I don't feel right today," she replied, as he suspected. He simply nodded and finished up as did Jeff. They walked around for a bit more before driving to the arena. When they got there, they walked to their assigned locker room. Amy immediately went to the bathroom and started jogging on the spot for five minutes. By the time she went to the main part of the locker room, Matt and Jeff had started doing press- ups. She joined in the exercising and resumed jogging on the spot then a few dozen sit-ups. After a quick workout to prepare them, they went to the ring and meet with the Dudleyz and Stacey Keibler for a six-person tag team match. As soon as they got their, she noticed them all flirting with Stacey who was wearing the short camouflage skirt and a tight short black top. "Guys, can we just get on with this?" shed asked, irritated. They turned around and agreed. All of them got into the ring and decided on their moves. Amy had quite an active part luckily. By half past four, they had finished practise and returned to their dressing rooms. As Jeff was taking a shower, Matt sat her down.  
  
"Now what's up with you? Ever since last night, you've been acting so weird. You usually eat loads for breakfast and get cookies," he inquired.  
  
"As I said, I'm not feeling too good. I'm fine Matt," she assured. He wasn't so sure but tried to forget about it. Besides, Amy was his best friend and she knew she could go to him if something was wrong. And by the end of the week, everything was back to normal. She still wasn't eating breakfast but everything else was okay. One day at the end of the week, he found Amy changing in the locker room.  
  
"Hey babe. Looks like you've lost some weight," he mentioned, kissing her on the cheek.  
  
"I didn't notice. Never mind anyway. Listen, I won't be coming clubbing tonight. I've got things to do," she told him. He nodded then went to shower. As he left the room, she let out a pleased laugh and stood on the weighing scale. She'd lost about seven pounds already. Satisfaction filled her body. Although she hated lying to her best friends, she had been covering everything up over the past six days. Instead of eating lunch in front of everyone, she 'ate' it on her own, so they thought. She just started throwing her food in the bin, along with the cookies. She only ever ate fruit, and very little quantities, and just drank water. She'd also been exercising a lot more than normal as well. It would only be for a few more weeks anyway but Matt's comments left her glowing with happiness. Looking in the mirror, she saw that she really had lost some weight. Jeff walked through the locker room and found her doing even more sit-ups.  
  
"Hey Amy. There's a dinner party thing next week to celebrate Shane McMahon's birthday. It's a three course meal and he expects us there," Jeff explained, sitting on the couch. She stopped her sit-ups for a moment and thought of how to get out of it. But she knew she couldn't be able to. Unless…there was only one solution she could resort to. She smiled at him then continued with her workout.  
  
So, that next week, everyone was enjoying themselves at the McMahon household. Unfortunately, for dessert, only fattening foods had been prepared so she had to eat whatever was on offer. Afterwards, she asked Steph where the toilets were. After being given directions, Amy made her way up the stairs. She became a bit nervous but took a few deep breaths to calm herself. Finding the bathroom, she entered and knelt in front of the toilet. So that she didn't lose her nerve, she immediately inserted two fingers into her throat. She scratched the back of her mouth and began coughing as nothing came up. She tried it again and this time, her food came back up. Until she felt her stomach was empty, she didn't stop making herself sick. When she was finished, she washed her hand then pooped some gum into her mouth to rid of the smell. She couldn't believe she had just done that! 


	3. Chapter 3

Title: A Hunger For Perfection-Chapter 3.  
  
Author: Carly.  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own anyone involved in this story.  
  
  
  
Another three weeks had passed and Amy had lost another seven pounds. Her weight had varied a bit. Though she was compulsively exercising, her metabolism had slowed a bit, causing her to seem a bit bigger than the day before, sometimes. She was still convinced that she was fat and needed to lose at least another fourteen pounds, which would give her weight of hundred and twelve pounds. She had gotten used to making herself sick when she had to eat if her friends were around. But none of them seemed to notice the fact that she was disappearing to the toilet after each meal and when she was alone, she wasn't eating anything and was constantly exercising.  
  
One Monday, she woke up at the normal time of 7am and quickly changed into shorts and a t-shirt, ready to go to the hotel gym. After just three hours sleep, Amy was exhausted but she still carried on, determined to lose the weight. When she got there, she immediately started exercising. Meanwhile, back in their hotel room, Matt woke up and found the other half of the bed empty. Seeing the bathroom light wasn't on, he figured where Amy was. 'You're blowing it out of proportion, Matt. She's fine,' he thought to himself. He tried getting back to sleep for an hour but a niggling feeling deep down was telling him something was wrong. Getting out from the bed, he changed into his jeans and a top and went looking for Amy. Walking around the hotel, he saw Adam and Jay.  
  
"Hey man, what you doing up so early?" Adam asked as they slapped hands.  
  
"Looking for Amy. She was gone when I awoke this morning," he explained.  
  
"Speaking of her, is she okay? She's been looking really ill lately."  
  
"She's says that she got a cold. That's all. I'll see you round guys." Matt carried on walking and found her in the gym. But instead of going in, he watched her for a while. She looked exhausted and worn out yet continued pushing herself to exercise. After half an hour, he got fed up and entered. Amy smiled when she saw him and stopped the treadmill for a second. Her head was pounding but she tried to ignore the dizziness. Out of nowhere, he asked how long she'd been working out for. Reluctantly she explained that she'd started since just after seven and it was now nine o'clock. He shook his head and left her, making Amy feel guilty. Sinking to the floor, she began crying. 'I wouldn't have to do this if I wasn't so damn fat!' she cursed herself. Grabbing her water, she went back to her room and straight into the bathroom. Immediately, she began hacking at her stomach as though she was rapping the fat from her body. Looking at her appearance in the mirror, all she was an obese body and face. The fact that Matt had some idea what was going on still didn't stop her. She needed to lose the weight. Besides, if they hadn't made those comments that night at the club, she wouldn't have had to resort to a fasting diet.  
  
Matt, Amy and Jeff had a photo shoot later that day. It was eleven o'clock and extremely hot. As they were changing into their outfits, she noticed they were a little more loose than normal. She smiled at this; glad she had lost some weight yet she still thought she had a long way to go before finding an acceptable weight. She noticed Matt looking at her as she was changing and it made her feel uncomfortable. Normally, it wouldn't have but she felt he was thinking about how fat she was. 'Would he really think that? He certainly did three weeks ago!' she asked herself in her mind. As the photographers snapped the pictures, they decided they wanted to have Matt and Amy close together as a 'couple' shot. They reluctantly did so but she was dreading Matt feeling the rolls of fat that hung on her. The group shots had all been taken so Jeff went back to the hotel. Matt and Amy were sitting atop of a car and when they went to get down, dizziness set in again through lack of nutrition. She was getting off the car when she almost fainted. Matt caught her and helped her to the car. After checking to see if she was okay, the trainer allowed them back to the hotel.  
  
"What the hell is going on with you?" he shouted when they got back to the hotel. Amy lied down on the bed and sighed.  
  
"Nothing, I'm just tired," she replied, closing her eyes.  
  
"There's more to it than that."  
  
"No, there isn't. It's none of your business anyway," she yelled.  
  
"Sorry for trying to be a friend and being worried about you."  
  
"If you were my friend, you'd leave me alone!" With that, she stormed from the room. Matt punched the wall in anger. Why couldn't she realise that he was worried about her? Why couldn't he realise she just wanted to look perfect? He sighed and fell to the bed, thinking about the situation. Meanwhile, Amy was continuing with everything and making herself sick. The hunger pains had started to annoy her so she had to eat but threw it up, afraid of putting any weight on. As she was walking through the halls, she bumped into some friends. They all complimented her on her slimmer figure, making Amy smile with contentment. 'To hell with Matt. I want to be thin, and I intend to,' she thought determinedly, not knowing what she was about to do would turn her life upside down… 


	4. Chapter 4

Title: A Hunger For Perfection-Chapter 4.  
  
Author: Carly.  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own anyone involved in this story.  
  
  
  
The music started up and, Stacy and Torrie came out to the boos of the crowd. They got in the ring and started flirting the special guest referee, Mick Foley. It was only an act to gain more chance of winning but Mick was having none of it. Amy watched backstage, ready to go after Trish. She watched on the monitor while doing some last minute stretches and couldn't help but feel some form of envy towards Stacy, as she was naturally skinny. She'd kept her diet up and had started exercising more frequently. She'd also cut out all snacks, was only eating an apple for lunch and a salad for dinner. And even though she knew the weight was gradually dropping off, she thought she still didn't look any thinner. If anything, she had only put on more, despite the fact people were telling her otherwise.  
  
"And her partner, Lita!" Lillian Garcia announced into the microphone. Amy did the guns as the crowd cheered her presence. Jogging slightly down the ramp, she met up with Trish before diving into the ring and the match immediately started. She began pounding on Stacey until Mick dragged her off. When Trish tagged Amy back in after beating Torrie up, she got in the ring and pulled Stacey in. Immediately, she ripped her top off but jealousy filled her body at how skinny Stacy really was. And when they pulled Amy's top off, she took a deep breath and held her stomach in, afraid of looking as obese as she thought she was. Towards the end of the match, her mind wasn't on the match anymore, but how skinny they all were. Frustrated, she continued beating on her two opponents. She and Trish ended up victorious after a moonsault from the match and they returned to the back happily.  
  
But once they got back to the respective locker rooms, Matt looked at her with a thunderous expression on her face. He'd found slimming pills in her bag after looking for his t-shirt which she had recently borrowed. But he decided to give her the benefit of the doubt and calmly explained of his discovery. Yet instead of telling him what was going on, she just started yelling at him.  
  
"You had no right to go through my bag!" she yelled.  
  
"How was I to know you were hiding this?" he replied in the same tone of voice. Angrily, he threw the bottle of pills against the wall, watching it smash into tiny pieces. "What the hell are you doing to yourself Amy?" he asked sadly.  
  
"I'm just trying to lose some weight. God, it's not as though I'm fucking anorexic." With that, she stormed out of the room and found a nearby gym. She spent a good three hours there before jogging back to the hotel. Fortunately, Matt wasn't there so she continued jogging on the spot and doing sit ups. When he did return, he had a McDonald's in his hands. Inside, Amy rapidly became worried.  
  
"If you claim you're ok, then you can eat this," he said, raising his eyebrows.  
  
"Sure, of course I can. But only the burger as I've gone off chips," she replied, looking through the bag. Pulling a cheeseburger out, she unwrapped it and very slowly, ate it. Once finished, she stood up and headed towards the bathroom. "I'm having a shower because I reek!" she laughed. Matt smiled to himself. Maybe he had just blown the matter out of proportion. He got up from the floor where they had been sitting and climbed into bed, reading the new script for tomorrow's show. But back in the bathroom, Amy had the shower and a radio on. Lifting the seat of the toilet up, she knelt down and took a deep breath before inserting two fingers into her throat. At first, nothing came up except some bile and she started coughing. Taking another breath, she did it again. This time, the undigested burger came up. Amy continued making herself sick until everything left her body. Standing up, she flushed the toilet before splashing some water on her face and brushing her teeth. She stripped out of her clothes and weighed herself on the scales. Another nine pounds lost. She was already down to hundred and five pounds. Happily, she jumped into the shower and washed her, also scrubbing herself with strawberry scented shower gel to get rid of the sickly smell.  
  
When she got out, she grabbed some clothes from her bag and changed back in the bathroom. If she changed in front of Matt, he only would have said something. After brushing her hair, she left the room and climbed under the covers next to him. Knowing that he would wrap his arms around her stomach, she grabbed a pillow and placed it front of her abdomen so he wouldn't notice that fact that her ribs were now more visible. She curled into a ball slightly and began drifting off to sleep. Sure enough, his arms encircled her.  
  
"You smell nice," he mumbled tiredly. "Are you all right? Why have got a pillow by your stomach?"  
  
"I, umm, I have period pains," she lied but smiling at the same time. She felt Matt laugh against her neck and pull her closer. Placing a kiss on her shoulder, he slowly fell asleep. Amy looked over her shoulder and sighed. She hated lying to her best friend about her eating problem but felt he wouldn't understand. Gently kissing his forehead, she too began drifting off.  
  
The next day, she woke up at six thirty and quickly changed before leaving the room to go to the hotel gym. After two hours of exercising, she decided to go for a swim. She went back to her room and carefully opened the door, not to wake Matt up. Luckily, he was still fast asleep. Going through her bag, she retrieved her bikini and a towel before changing into them and jogging back down to the pool. Except for one or two others, it was empty. Amy dived in and began swimming length after length. Back and forth she swam, trying to keep up speed but gaining tired after a while. Once another half hour had gone by, she retreated to her room. Thankfully, he was still sleeping, and snoring loudly. Amy towel dried her then changed back into her old T-shirt and went back to bed so Matt wouldn't know she'd been gone.  
  
~Later That Evening~  
  
"Guys, is Amy okay? She's really lost weight lately. It's not normal," Adam questioned Matt and Jeff as they all got ready for their matches.  
  
"Umm, yeah. She's probably just been too busy to eat recently," the dark-haired Hardy answered, unconvincingly. Jay and Chris stopped talking and listened to the others talking. Almost every Federation star had noticed the rapid decrease in her weight but hen they questioned her, she would get very defensive and snap at everyone. They'd all learnt to leave the subject alone when she was around. Torrie had even received a punch from Amy after making a few unhelpful comments. Needless to say, she ended up with a huge black eye. None of the other divas had mentioned it since. Just then, the redheaded vixen entered the room. She knew they'd been talking about her as they all went deadly quiet. Carefully, Chris asked her if she had eaten anything all day.  
  
"What's it got to do with you?" she snapped.  
  
"Ames, we're just worried about you," Matt said, placing his hands on her arms, trying to calm her down.  
  
"Well, I'm fine. If this is all you're going to talk about now, then what's the point in me being friends with you lot?" Grabbing her bag, she left the room. Matt sighed and shrugged his shoulders at the others. Meanwhile, Amy was on the wall outside the arena. Despite it being sunny out, she was still freezing. Hearing her stomach rumble, she pressed her hand against it. But it wouldn't stop so she punched her stomach, as though trying to warn it to shut up. She drank some water and popped some gum into her mouth before going for a quick jog. She felt bad for screaming at Matt and told herself she would apologise later.  
  
When Raw finished, she jogged back to the hotel alone. It was late at night and all the other wrestlers were either clubbing, driving to their next destination or back at the hotel. As she ran back, she thought of what to tell Matt. Arriving back, she continued jogging up the stairs, instead of taking the lift. Once she got outside her door, she stopped exercising and waited for her breathing to return to normal. Straightening her clothes out, she opened the door and walked over to the bed, pulling off her baggy pants and climbing under the quilt.  
  
"Hey," she started, nervously. "Umm Matt, listen. In truth, I did go on a diet to lose weight but it was only for my match at Invasion. I didn't want to look fat. But, it's over with now, everything will go back to normal," she confessed.  
  
"Thank god. I want the old Amy back, okay?" he smiled, hugging her. Kissing her cheek, he pulled back and began talking to her until they fell asleep. 'Like hell I'm going to quit my diet!' she thought to herself, looking at her stomach through her t-shirt and still seeing the 'fat' there. 


	5. Chapter 5

Title: A Hunger For Perfection-Chapter 5.  
  
Author: Carly.  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own anyone involved in this story.  
  
  
  
Amy kept her diet up as she promised to herself. Though, she had been a lot more secretive about not eating. If she was with friends, then she would either say she was not hungry, she was ill or would pretend she was busy then disappear to exercise. But if she had to eat, then she would only make herself sick straight afterwards. To do this, she'd drink a lot of water throughout the meal then pretend she needed to use the bathroom, as her bladder was so full. However, Matt still had suspicions of what she was doing. He decided he needed other females to talk to Amy.  
  
"Can I come in?" he asked after knocking on the Diva's dressing room door. "Hey guys, is Amy here?"  
  
"Umm, no. But you can find her in Vince's office," Trish replied.  
  
"I'm not looking for her actually. I need to talk to you about her. Have any of you noticed she's gotten really thin lately?"  
  
"Yeah, we all have but if we try talking to her, she gets really bitchy," Terri said.  
  
"Well, could you at least try and ask if she's okay? I mean, from a female perspective, she might listen to you. Just keep trying and if she blows up then tell me. Thanks guys." He left then to finish getting ready and returned to his own locker room where Jeff was sitting, reading some leaflets. When Matt moved closer, he saw they were about anorexia. He sighed. He didn't really want to believe that was anorexic, or at least on the verge of. Why did she have to let it get this far? What even triggered it in the first place? Was it the death of her father? Had someone called her fat? How could starve herself? There were so many unrequited questions floating in his mind but Amy was the only one who could really answer them.  
  
Meanwhile, Amy was outside Vince's office. She was feeling incredibly dizzy but Mr. McMahon had insisted on having a private meeting with her. Leaning against the wall, she tried to stop feeling so light-headed but nothing worked. She hadn't eaten a single thing that day, or for the last two weeks actually. Except for just drinking water, she didn't eat or drink anything else, afraid of piling the pounds back on. Vince opened the door and called Amy inside. She entered the room and instantly sat down, afraid she was going to faint.  
  
"Now Miss. Dumas, I'm very concerned about you. A lot of people have made me aware that you've lost an excessive amount of weight lately. You know the rules, if you're under weight, then you are temporarily dismissed until you're better," Vince informed.  
  
"Mr. McMahon, I'm not underweight. Yes, I've been dieting but it's stopped. It was just until, Invasion," she lied.  
  
"Well then, you will have no problem in one of the medical trainers weighing you later." Amy was shocked. Twenty-six and she was being weighed. Everyone was treating her like a child and it wasn't appreciated. She left the office and went for a walk to clear her head. The giddiness had since stopped so she decided to jog instead. It was midday so all the other wrestlers would be having lunch at the arena by now and she certainly didn't want to eat. As she was running, she passed a pharmacy. Remembering she was out of slimming pills, she went in. She grabbed a basket and filled it with various things including the pills. Luckily, there was hardly anyone there and just an old bloke behind the counter. She bought the products with any inquiry about the pills. Smiling, she returned back to the hotel and hid the bottle in her bag, along with laxatives and a recipe book. It had become common for her to cook meals for Matt, Jeff, Shannon and Shane yet ate nothing herself when they were home.  
  
Sitting on the bed, she tried getting some sleep but failed in doing so. She was barely sleeping anymore and it was really beginning to show. But Amy was wearing more makeup to hide the bags under her eyes and paleness of her skin. She climbed under the covers anyway, trying to warm herself up. Just as she got comfortable, there was a knock at the door. Sighing she got up and answered it.  
  
"Hey," Stacy Keibler greeted.  
  
"Umm, hey. What do you want?" she asked rather angrily.  
  
"I need a word, that's all. Can I come in?" Amy moved aside and watched as the leggy blonde sat on the bed. "Amy, everyone is worried about you. Why are you loosing so much weight?"  
  
"It's none of your fucking business. If you came here to talk about weight then I'd much rather you left. Oh, and stay out of my business. Tell everyone to leave me alone from now on. I'm so sick of the questions. Goodbye!" With that said, well yelled, she slammed the door and went back to bed. But the frustrations built in her body and the only way to get rid of the pent-up anger would be to exercise as she had learnt over recent weeks. Luckily, Matt was sharing a room with Jeff so he couldn't just walk in. After two hours of solid exercising, she finally came to a stop, breathless and worn out. Normally, she could have kept going but the fact that she hadn't eaten had made her weak. Her sugar level was at an all time low, causing her body to become extremely tired all the time.  
  
Amy had stayed in her hotel room all day so that she didn't have to be weighed and confronted by everyone, Matt especially. But the next night, after driving home, they decided to have a barbecue. So, Shannon and Shane went around to Jeff's house along with Matt and Amy. When they got there, Jeff had already started grilling the food. Burgers. Steaks. Sausages. Loads. They also had creates of drinks. Her stomach turned at all the food. She quickly ran inside to the bathroom and threw up. It wasn't self- inflicted this time but all the bloody meat and repulsive smells had made her naturally sick. Matt chased after her and found her in the bathroom, holding her stomach as more contented came up. He knew she hadn't caused it herself this time, as he never once saw her stick her finger down her throat but watched as even more came up. He soaked a towel and pressed it against her head.  
  
"You okay?" he asked.  
  
"No, and I didn't make myself sick!" she snapped, fiercely.  
  
"Hey, calm down, I never said…."  
  
"Yeah, well everyone else does and I'm fed up with it!" Amy fled from the house in tears. Matt knew what was going on; it was another symptom…of anorexia. 


	6. Chapter 6

Title: A Hunger For Perfection-Chapter 6.  
  
Author: Carly.  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own anyone involved in this story.  
  
  
  
~Three Weeks Later~  
  
Amy walked through the arena, happily. Finding her assigned locker room, she walked in to find Matt talking on the phone. She quietly sat down and flipped through a magazine until he finished his conversation. When he turned to look at Amy, he was distraught by her appearance. He hadn't seen her for the past three weeks and now really saw the difference. Her cheeks had sunk in a bit more, she looked tired and pale, her clothes hung even looser off her body and the sparkle had disappeared from her hazel eyes.  
  
"I met someone last night!" she gushed, smiling.  
  
"Oh what? Really? Who?" he asked shaking his head to get rid of his thoughts.  
  
"Bryan. He's coming to meet me after the show. Though, if he's taking me out then something might happen but I look too fat. I need to lose weight."  
  
"Are you crazy? Amy, you're too thin now!"  
  
"Matt, I'm not having this conversation again. Just be happy for me. God." He shook his head in disbelief. There was never a right time to discuss the situation of her weight. He watched as Amy left the room angrily. He flopped back on the sofa, sighing heavily. He had to figure out a way to stop it before it got completely out of hand. He knew the damage it could case; he'd seen it happen to his cousin. She'd started dieting but was soon in hospital with heart and kidney failure. She'd just about managed to pull through in time. If she had left it any longer, it would have been fatal. And now Amy was following down that same path but Matt wasn't going to let that happen. Somehow, someway, he'd stop her.  
  
That evening, after the show, Matt was trying to find Amy. He walked into the parking lot of the arena and saw her kissing a tall, blonde bloke who he guessed was Bryan. He continued walking over and called her away but she refused to 'talk', knowing what the conversation would involve. Instead, he walked away and got into his own car to drive back to the home as the Federation was in North Carolina for that week. It wasn't long, half an hour to be exact, when Amy walked through the door, apologising. She had felt guilty snapping at Matt earlier. And she had promised to start eating properly…again. It was just a false promise. But as a fortnight, she seemed that she was eating again…right?  
  
Wrong. Amy woke up on a Thursday morning, knowing Matt and Jeff would be calling around. So, she went downstairs and made a bowl of cereal only to throw it away and leave the bowl on the sink. She did the same with the Chinese she ordered the night before. She emptied it into the toilet and flushed it, getting rid of it all. She had learnt this had stopped them accusing her so much. She quickly changed then started doing her normal routine exercises. Three hundred sit-ups, fifty press-ups, an hour on the running machine, stretches, exercise bike for another hour and repeat. And as usual, she was completely exhausted. But she still found the energy to weigh herself. Ninety-eight pounds, that's all she was. But then why was she still so fat?  
  
There was a knock at the door and she went to answer it. Bryan was there with a huge bouquet of flowers in his hands. He handed them to Amy and kissed her in greeting. Her heart and face lit up. Ushering him inside, she closed the door then joined him on the couch. They talked for a bit then watched TV. After a while, he offered to take her out for a meal later. Amy instantly refused without hesitation then quickly explained that she was busy after seeing the expression on his face. Amy kissed him so they didn't have to talk anymore, and it soon became intense. They didn't even hear the back door shut. Matt and Jeff entered through the kitchen. He looked at the used bowl on the sink and smiled.  
  
"Seems like she kept her promise," he said to Jeff. The younger Hardy nodded in agreement, also happy to see that she was eating again, or so they thought. She did start to have colour in her cheeks and looked as though she was putting the weight back on but they weren't really sure as she continued to wear baggy clothes, even in the ring. Instead of the tight short tops she usually wore, she now went out in t-shirts that always covered her stomach. A few days later, tough, his fears were answered again. They decided to go clubbing after the house show. Matt had finished getting ready so went to call for Amy. She had gotten her own room again, claiming she was ill and didn't want him to catch whatever she had. As he had a spare key, he just walked in, to find her going through her bag for a top to wear. Her ribcage was a lot more visible. It repulsed him to see that. When she pulled a top on, he finally got her attention. "You ready to go?"  
  
"Oh hey. Didn't hear you come in. let me get my bag and we'll go," she answered, retrieving her bag before leaving. She could tell he was distracted. "Are you okay? You seem troubled."  
  
"No, I'm fine," he lied, but all he could really think about was the sight of her bony body. He couldn't believe he had let her get so bad, wasting away, yet what could he do about it? Nothing. It was a vicious cycle. She wouldn't eat, she would lose more weight, he'd confront her, she'd yell, they'd make up before it started again. When they arrived at the club, they saw some of the other wrestlers there. Amy felt jealous. All the other divas were clad in tight top while she had a baggy halter-top on, as she was too fat. 'Man, I really need to lose some weight,' she thought, glumly. She ordered a cocktail to drown her sorrows. Without realising, she had the cherry that had been placed on top. Immediately, she felt bloated. Without saying anything to anyone, she got up and disappeared to the bathroom, which was luckily empty.  
  
Locking the door, she entered one of cubicles and knelt down, instantly inserting her fingers into her throat. Amy scratched the back of her mouth until sick began to arise from her stomach. She retched for a minute, coughing and spluttering. After it subsided, she continued bringing up everything she could. She flushed the toilet and went to the sink to rinse her face. She re-applied some makeup and had some gum to get rid of the smell. She started brushing her hair, only to find a clump had fallen out. Shocked, she dropped the brush. Why had this happened? She was nowhere near anorexic, she was still too fat! There was a knock on the door so she put everything back in her bag and left. Left the bathroom and the club. But Matt chased her. Pretending not to hear him, she carried on.  
  
"Amy, wait up!" he called out. "What's going on?" he questioned once he caught up with her.  
  
"Nothing, just leave me alone."  
  
"I've been doing that for the past few months and look at what's going on?"  
  
"What the hell is that supposed to mean?"  
  
"It means I'm sick of you shutting me out. I've been watching you waste away. You're too thin, you never eat, you're always angry, you exercise compulsively, the list goes on. These are all signs of anorexia, Amy…" 


	7. Chapter 7

Title: A Hunger For Perfection-Chapter 7.  
  
Author: Carly.  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own anyone involved in this story.  
  
  
  
The next day, Matt and Amy sat at opposite sides of the table during a meeting Vince had called. They had had a huge fight the night before and still weren't speaking. Everyone noticed the tension between them but neither would say anything about it. All of Matt's fears, concerns and a few horrible comments had been released and Amy was still angry with him. He'd called her quite a few names in the heat of the moment yet hadn't even tried apologising. That wasn't to say he wasn't feeling guilty. True, he called her a few things, but instantly regretted them and had been feeling in the wrong ever since.  
  
Vince entered the hall and everyone stopped talking. He began talking about forthcoming matches and their results. He talked for another half an hour about upcoming storylines, mainly Steve Williams and Paul Levesque's as they were the two biggest stars of the company. At the end, Vince requested a meeting with Amy immediately after. She wondered what it was about. As the meeting ended, she pushed passed Matt and walked towards Mr. McMahon's office. She arrived outside his door and waited for him to return. Within five minutes, he came back.  
  
"Come in, Amy," he said, holding the door open for her. She smiled politely and entered his office, sitting down in one of the plush chairs. "Now, it's come to my attention that you haven't been eating and a few people have said that you are suffering from anorexia."  
  
"Mr. McMahon, I haven't got an eating disorder. I've been eating normally again for weeks," she lied. Before the conversation could go any further, they were interrupted when someone burst through the door, as a few problems had occurred backstage.  
  
"We'll continue this later, Miss. Dumas." Amy left the office and went for a walk before decided to jog back to the hotel for an hour to exercise. Luckily, no one passed her as she left the arena. But when she got outside, she found herds of fans there. After reluctantly signing a few things and taking some pictures, she ran back to the hotel. By the time she arrived, she was already out of breath, as she didn't have much energy from not eating but forced herself to workout. She'd gotten her own room again so nobody would find out. The hunger pains were really getting to her. Her stomach rumbled, begging for food. Ignoring the, she began exercising for forty-five minutes before jumping in the shower and changing so she didn't have to get ready at the arena in front of everyone. After drying her hair and applying her makeup, she pulled her baggy pants and her red top on. She had to wear a belt though as her pants were too loose.  
  
Because everyone was still at the arena and she didn't have a car, it meant she had to walk back but Amy wasn't really complaining, as it was more exercise. Everyone she passed looked at her strangely because she had a think coat on but it was boiling outside. But because she hadn't eaten then her body temperature was freezing. Nothing seemed to warm her up; she was still shivering underneath her jacket. Upon arriving, she was met by Matt.  
  
"Ames, I'm sorry for last night. I said some things I shouldn't have but I still stand by the fact that maybe you're…"  
  
"Matt, I appreciate you apologising but I don't want to hear any more of me being too thin. I am eating," she protested. He nodded his head and followed her inside to their locker room. While he was in the shower area, Amy searched through her bag and found her slimming pills. Grabbing a bottle of water, she swallowed one…then two, then three…four…five…six…seven. The bottle was empty. She heard Matt walking out so shoved the bottle back into her bag and pretended to look for something. She feigned being distracted so that she didn't have to talk to Matt. She quickly announced she was going to get a 'snack' from the vending machine but instead took a rapid drive to a nearby pharmacy to get more tablets. By the time she got back, he had gone to Shane and Lance's locker room to practise. Amy hid the pills in her bag then went with her cookies to find him. But as she was on her way, she dumped the contents into the bin then walked into her friends' dressing room pretending to swallow the last of the cookies and scrunched up the bag, tossing it aside. Everyone looked surprised as they thought she had really been eating.  
  
"Right, let's start practising," Shane suggested. Amy had her back turned to everyone and was stretching her arm when Matt saw a huge bruise on her shoulder.  
  
"Jesus, what the hell happened?" he asked, standing up to check on her. "Don't tell me Bryan did this!"  
  
"Oh umm, no. I had a bad fall the other day," she replied, nervously. Bryan hadn't hit her but she knew the bruise had been there for the past two weeks…there was also some on her ribs but she didn't know why. After a few minutes of trying to reassure him Bryan hadn't hit her, they starting strategising. But Amy couldn't seem to concentrate; she was too dizzy. She faked being okay and continued trying to be involved in the conversation. She needed to know what was going to happen that night during their match. By the time they'd finished it, Amy was on the verge of collapsing. When Shane asked if her if she way okay though, she started shouting at him to stay out of her business and left the room.  
  
~During Their Match~  
  
Lillian Garcia introduced Hurricane Helms, Lance Storm and Mighty Molly before Team Xtreme came out to the cheering crowd. They did the gunz then got into position. Matt was up against Helms first. They did a few of performed as planned before tagging their partners in. Jeff started wrestling with Lance for a few minutes until Jeff did a corkscrew moonsault from the top rope. Helms entered the ring and attacked the younger Hardy. Matt went to save his brother as he and his off-screen best friend starting fighting outside. Lita and Molly leaped in and started fighting as well. But after a while, Amy became incredibly light-headed and fell against the ropes to stop herself from fainting. They all saw this and exchanged faces, telling each other to improvise. The Hardyz got into the ring as did Storm and Helms.  
  
"Do the Twist Of Fate and Swanton," Matt informed them all when they were all down. Amy was outside, leaning on the apron, holding her head the pain was so bad. The others did the changed ending, causing Team Xtreme to win. They celebrated then returned backstage.  
  
~Backstage~  
  
Not wanting any confrontation, she quickly disappeared. Once she got to her locker room, she fell to the leather couch, tears streaming down her cheeks. She didn't even know why she was crying. After half an hour, one of her co-workers called her to Vince's office. After wiping the tears away and making herself look presentable, Amy made her way to her boss's office. Knocking on the door, she entered, surprised to see Matt and Jeff already there.  
  
"What's going on?" she inquired, confused.  
  
"Please sit down. What happened out there?" Vince asked, almost angrily.  
  
"I was just dizzy. Nothing serious."  
  
"Ames, this isn't normal. Have you seen yourself lately?" Jeff asked.  
  
"What are you talking about? I'm fine."  
  
"Unless you don't sort yourself out Amy, then I'm afraid I'm going have to dismiss you from the company."  
  
"Why? There's nothing wrong!"  
  
"You have anorexia and you can't wrestle. If you claim you're okay, then lift up your top and we'll decided four ourselves…" 


	8. Chapter 8

Title: A Hunger For Perfection-Chapter 8.  
  
Author: Carly.  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own anyone involved in this story.  
  
  
  
"This is stupid. I'm fine. Besides, I have nothing to prove to you. Especially you Vince," Amy screamed, looking at her boss who immediately knew what she was talking about.  
  
"Look, I haven't got time for this. You are all dismissed for now," he lied to escape the truth from being told. Matt and Jeff complied his instructions and left, completely confused about what had just happened within the last minute. Amy had already gone and was now nowhere to be seen but their guess was either at the gym or jogging back to the hotel, some form of exercise at least. The two Hardy brothers decided to go and look for her to find out what was going on. But after half an hour, they still hadn't seen her so retreated back to their locker room. They needed to collect their things together before driving to their next destination for Smackdown tapings. As they were walking through the halls of the arena, fans approached them, thrusting all sorts of things in their faces to sign.  
  
One thing that caught Matt's eye was a photo of all three of them, six months ago when everything was normal. Now everything was messed up, especially with Amy. He signed the photo for the little boy before continuing walking to the car. When they reached Jeff's Corvette, they dumped their things in the back before getting in and decided to return to the hotel, in case Amy was there. Matt was about to change the radio stations but the chorus of a certain song caught his ears.  
  
The girl's going out of her head  
  
She's going crazy  
  
Girl's going out of her head  
  
She don't want to stop.  
  
As the song finished it, the radio host announced it as "Girl's Going Out Of Her Head" by Thunder. It reminded him of the fact that Amy seemed to be going insane; she had gotten utterly obsessed with her weight and exercising, and she couldn't seem to stop starving herself. Amy also had the same thoughts while listening to those four lines of the radio in the hotel room. She was lying on her bed, thinking about the situation. She really did want to get better but something inside was stopping her. Maybe it was satisfaction she had when she discovered she'd lost more weight, the way people often complimented her but at the same time, they didn't know how bad she was…except for Matt and Jeff. Despite the fact that she did want things to return to normal, when they offered her the hospitality, she wouldn't accept it. Instead, she'd yell and shout at them.  
  
Someone vigorously knocked on the door. Grunting, Amy got up and answered it. Matt and Jeff stood in the hallway, both holding a bottle of water. She invited them and watched as they sat on the edge of her bed. As they did so, Matt saw something that caught his eye, sticking out of her bag. She had gone into the bathroom for a minute so he pulled the object out. A book on how many calories certain food had. Sighing, he shoved it back just as she returned. Jeff looked at his older brother and shrugged.  
  
"Ames, are you ready to go?" he asked with sadness.  
  
"Umm yeah. Why do you sound so upset?"  
  
"I just…umm, nothing. Forget it." He knew he should just drop the subject for now. They had a three-hour drive and there would only be masses of tension between them all as it was guaranteed she'd only start screaming at them if he mentioned it. So in silence, they made their way to the parking lot. It was already eleven thirty so decided to take it in turns to drive in order to let the others sleep. But Amy was so tempted to eat when they pulled into a drive-thru. She was called into a ball and the music of the radio drowned out the sound of her rumbling stomach. Closing her eyes, she wished for it to stop. She was so hungry. But no, she couldn't risk eating. How many calories were in a McDonald's? Hundreds…thousands. She was surprised when Matt didn't ask if she wanted anything.  
  
An hour into the journey, he pulled over so Amy could drive. He and Jeff promptly feel asleep in the back seat. She was already tired and somewhat dizzy so took a tablet to help cure her headache. It did help but only to an extent. She was trying to concentrate on driving which all of a sudden, seemed hard to do. Because she hadn't slept much for weeks, lack of food and tiring herself out with exercising, she gradually began to fall asleep. But within a split second, the car started to get out of control. She suddenly jerked awake after hearing a loud, blaring horn. Amy pulled the car back into the right lane and stopped at a lay-by. Matt and Jeff had now also woken up. They all got out of the car. Amy couldn't stop the tears from falling. Matt engulfed into a protective hug and tightened his grip when her sobs became harder. She apologised repeatedly until eventually, she calmed down.  
  
Jeff got into the front seat and started driving as Matt and Amy climbed into the back. She laid her head on his lap and fell into a peaceful sleep with him stroking her hair. Even with the layers of clothes and a thick blanket over her, she was still cold. Shivering slightly, she pulled the covers closer to her body, trying to warm up more. After half an hour, she opened her eyes once again. Another failed attempt at sleeping. For the life of her, she just couldn't drift off. Sighing in frustration, she sat up and looked out of the window. Matt was sleeping heavily. She locked eyes with Jeff through the mirror.  
  
"He just worries about you Ames…we all do," he said, as if reading her mind.  
  
"I know," she whispered. "But…I…there's nothing wrong with me." Why was all she could do these day was lie? And to her best friends at that. God only knows how bad she wanted people to know how bad things were but something deep down was stopping her. Maybe saying out loud that she really was suffering from anorexia would only make her accept it. By keeping silent, she had convinced herself she was fine. When the truth was…  
  
~Two Days Later~  
  
Amy returned back to her house after a long, hard day. She'd been working out for the most part of the morning and afternoon before going to Matt's to go through all their fan mail which had taken them hours. Exhausted, she collapsed on the sofa and turned the TV on. But Bryan walked out from the kitchen, surprising her, as she hadn't expected him to be there.  
  
"Hey baby, I cooked you a nice meal. Come on," he told her, holding his hand out for her to take.  
  
"Umm, I've already eaten a huge meal at Matt's. I'm not hungry," she lied.  
  
"Oh well then, ok. Let's find something else to do then." Sitting down, he started kissing her neck. But she pushed him away, saying she was tired. They hadn't had sex yet and she didn't want to now, not only because she was tired but also as she didn't want him to see her body. He stood up and looked angry. Ignoring him, she laid back on the couch and without realising, her top rode up a bit, revealing a slight bruise. Bryan leaned over her, an irate expression on his face. Amy became scared and it showed on her face. At that moment, the door burst open and Matt walked through the door. He saw the situation and the bruise on her stomach, instantly concluding that he had hit her. He ran over and gripped Bryan against the wall.  
  
"Matt, what are you doing? Nothing's wrong. He hasn't hit me," she assured frantically, forcing him to releasing her boyfriend.  
  
"Then what about that bruise on you abdomen. You seem to have been getting a lot lately."  
  
"They're from the ring. Stacey and Torrie haven't been controlling their moves properly and I'm paying for it." Again, it was a lie.  
  
"Make sure that's all they are."  
  
~Six Months Since Diet Started~  
  
Amy's weight was now down to seventy-seven pounds. It had drastically plummeted within the last six months. She wasn't eating anything at this stage in time except for an apple, which she would throw up, or chuck in the bin after a few bites. And except for drinking a glass of water occasionally, she wasn't consuming any drink, afraid of the calories it would contain. Stephanie had also recently asked her if she was pregnant because she hadn't had her period for two months but Amy took this the wrong way and thought Steph meant she was fat. So, she had tried to lose even more weight. But luckily, an upcoming match was going to change things.  
  
Amy was in a match was Trish for Raw the next week. About two minutes into the match and after a few moves like the Head Scissors Takeover, she had become unbelievably faint. The arena was spinning and she struggled to focus on everything. But Amy forced herself to continue with the match. After several more moves had been performed, she gave Trish the Twist Of Fate then climbed on the turnbuckle to give her a Litcunrana. However, as she got to the top rope, she crouched down for a moment. Everything seemed far away, as though she was in a different world. Looking around slightly, the audience were just a blur swimming around in front of her eyes. Her head spun. She jumped down to the apron.  
  
"There's something wrong with Amy," the referee informed Trish, bending to down to pretend he was just checking on her. She pushed herself up just as Amy collapsed and fell to the mat. Knowing that this wasn't scripted, Jerry Lawler rushed to her side. He indicated for the EMT's to come down. Matt was backstage by the vending machine when Adam rushed up to him and informed him. Because he hadn't seen it, Matt didn't know the severity of it. He ran through the hall and made his way down the ramp to where she was laying, the medical staff around her.  
  
"We're going to have to take her to the hospital, now!" one of them told the others. One of the EMT's placed her hands on her stomach as they put her on the stretcher and she was horrified to feel the ribs sticking out. They rushed her backstage and into the ambulance to take her to the hospital. Jeff was in North Carolina after hurting his leg so couldn't be there but Matt had already phoned him and Amy's mother. After an hour of waiting, one of the doctors called him aside.  
  
"I'm afraid Amy dumas has anorexia nervosa. Her kidney has failed and her condition is extremely serious. Did you know about any of this?" he asked.  
  
"Man! I had an idea but whenever I confronted her, she denied it and it accused us to argue an awful lot which I didn't want."  
  
"I understand that but being a good friend sometimes mean risking the friendship. She only weight just under eighty pounds. You can see her now but don't stay long; she needs to rest." Matt made his way into her room and found her curled into a ball, staring out of the windows.  
  
"Hey. How are you feeling?" he asked, sincerely. She looked down and avoided his gaze. "All I want to know is why."  
  
"Remember about six months ago, we were at a club. You, Jeff, Adam and Jay made some jokes about me being fat and I thought…" she started but stopped when the tears shot down her face. Choking back the sobs, she continued, "earlier that day, Vince said I needed to lose weight and with this comments you guys made, I did."  
  
"So, we triggered it. Amy, I am so incredibly sorry. But Vince…you didn't need to lose weight, babe. We were pissed as hell but I'm still sorry."  
  
"I know you are, but I let it get so bad. I want help Matt, I want to get better." 


	9. Chapter 9

Chap 9 is *finally* here! Sorry it's been so long but with finding  
  
out I'm pregnant and school and whatever, I've been very busy and  
  
then my computer packed in! I know this chap is quite short but I was doing at 1am last night! There's only one or two more to this before I start the sequel. Anyway, I hope you enjoy...  
  
To Title: A Hunger For Perfection-Chapter 9.  
  
Author: Carly.  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own anyone involved in this story.  
  
  
  
After two weeks in the hospital, Amy left, determined to get better. But that was easier said than done. After talking to the doctors, Matt arranged to take care of Amy. He had asked Vince for a few weeks off and began helping her move in with him. They had talked for hours each day about everything that had happened over the past few months and he had come to understand more of her condition.  
  
One morning Amy woke up to the sun leaking through her window. She groaned and turned over, opening her eyes to see what time it was. 9am. It was the first time in months when she'd been home that she hadn't got up in the middle of the night to exercise. Half of her felt upset that she might have put weight on while the other part of her was happy. It was a sign, even if it was only small, that she might get better. Knowing Matt wouldn't be awake just yet, she decided to have a shower to pass the time. Stripping the covers away, she went to the bathroom and rid herself of her tank top and shorts before climbing under the lukewarm water, spraying down on her body to revitalise her. Amy washed her hair then got out and fished around for a towel. But when she looked at the mirror, she took a proper look at herself. For the first time, she admitted to herself of being too thin and her determination only grew stronger. Slightly smiling to herself, she wrapped a towel around her damp body and walked back to her room to change.  
  
Amy was in the living room watching the TV when Matt came down the stairs, rubbing his eyes. He said good morning to her then collapsed next to her on the couch. They sat in silence for a few minutes before he cautiously asked if she wanted anything for breakfast. He quickly saw a mixed expression on her face, as though part of her wanted to eat but the other half didn't.  
  
"Even if it's only something small. You have to get better Amy," he explained softly, taking her hands in his.  
  
"I know Matt…but it's hard," she replied, tears forming in her eyes.  
  
"Look, I can't really understand because I haven't been through anything like this and it's my first time in dealing with anyone who's suffering from anorexia but I don't want to lose you. You're my best friend and I want…I need you to get better."  
  
"I'll just have an apple or something then." Matt nodded and smiled. He went to this kitchen and grabbed an apple for her and a bowl of cereal for himself. Granted an apple wasn't much but it was better than nothing. And he had to make sure she didn't make herself sick afterwards. After eating, Matt intentionally used the bathroom to shower so she couldn't throw up. He quickly got dressed then went downstairs where Amy was still watching the television. It was eleven o'clock when he suggested going over Jeff's for the afternoon. She agreed and grabbed her jacket. She hadn't seen Jeff in over a week and was beginning to miss him. They got into his car and drove for ten minutes until they reached his house. Nervously, she walked inside. The doctors had made her eat over the past fortnight and she was worried what Jeff would think she was too fat. Even though she wanted to get better, it didn't mean that Amy wanted to put the weight on. She'd fell guilty eating even the smallest amount of food.  
  
"Hey guys. How are you doing Ames?" Jeff asked, greeting his best friend and older brother.  
  
"I'm okay. Things are hard but I'm getting through it all," Amy replied, patting Liger on the head.  
  
"Umm, well I was just making lunch if you want anything…" he offered, trailing off.  
  
"Err, ok but nothing too big," she said, shocking both of them. They all walked through to the kitchen and Jeff prepared chicken sandwiches, making sure to add more chicken to Amy's than she wanted. It was the only way she would gain weight. He carefully set the plate in front of her, hoping she wouldn't notice which she luckily didn't. But it took her ages to consume it all. Most of the time, she picked tiny amounts off the bread off to nibble. Eating smaller amounts would help her body digest the food faster. During conversation, they had arranged for Matt and Amy to stay at Jeff's for the night. They already had clothes there and Cody was staying at Gilbert's so everything was sorted.  
  
After lunch, Amy announced that she was going to shower. Before giving either of the brothers a chance to say anything, she had disappeared up the stairs. Entering the bathroom, she stripped out of her clothes and turned the tap on. Even though she had taken a shower that morning, she was in the mood for a nice relaxing bath. She stood at the edge, leaning over to test the warmth of the water with her hand. Amy flipped her hair behind her shoulder as it kept on falling down and her eyes caught sight of the toilet. Immediately, she pictured what she'd just eaten and all the calories…the temptation was too great. Kneeling down, she stuck her fingers down her throat, crying as the food came up. The running water drowned out the sounds of her splutters and sobs. Flushing the toilet, she fell against the bath, curling into a ball. She'd been doing so well lately, but it was all ruined now.  
  
Days passed again and no one had mentioned anything. She was suspicious that they heard her but they obviously didn't as they would have brought it up. She had made herself sick since then but the guilt still raged inside of her. Not only had she let down herself but Matt and Jeff, even though they didn't know. After another three days, Amy was eating a little more but still found it hard. One night, Matt offered to make her a meal to celebrate the fact that she'd been out of hospital for a month. But after eating, all she could think was the calories she'd devoured. Making her excuses, she stumbled up the stairs and into the bathroom. Her head was so busy thinking that she forgot to lock the door. Just as she started, the door flew open and a shocked Matt Hardy stood at the entrance.  
  
"Why Amy?" he asked in disbelief.  
  
"I'm sorry," she sobbed, falling into his arms. He held her to his chest as she cried uncontrollably. "It was only the second time. I'm sorry, Matt."  
  
"I thought you were getting better."  
  
"I was, I am…."  
  
"Amy, do you want professional help or any help at all?" 


	10. Chapter 10

Title: A Hunger For Perfection-Chapter 10.  
  
Author: Carly.  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own anyone involved in this story.  
  
  
  
"Amy?" Matt called up the stairs. "Vince is on the phone for you." Amy came from her room and down the staircase, taking the phone receiver from Matt.  
  
"Hey Vince, what's up?" she asked, landing on the sofa.  
  
"Well, I was just wondering how you were doing and if you'll be back anytime soon?" Mr. McMahon asked.  
  
"Umm, I'm doing ok. I have no idea when I'll be back though," she explained. "I'm going to the hospital tomorrow for a check-up." After talking with her boss for another five minutes, she hung up the phone. Matt had told Vince that she had been making herself sick and he had warned her to get help or she'd be fired. Of course, Amy promised to get better but whenever she ate, she wanted to throw it up again. But she was determined to get better. Amy wanted her old life back, when she was happy all the time, when she hung out with her friends, when she wrestled.  
  
It was Tuesday morning and Amy wanted to do something with Matt. He had been so patient with her over the past three weeks since coming out of hospital and she wanted to show him her appreciation. Most of her friends were beginning to get fed up, forcing her to eat when she didn't want to. But Matt sat with her when she ate and talked to her casually, so her mind wasn't thinking of what she was eating. It was already three o'clock in the afternoon when Amy found Matt outside, playing with Cody, even though her dog was climbing on top of Matt, licking him to death.  
  
"Hey, what you doing?" she asked, laughing at the sight in front of her.  
  
"Getting trampled to death by your dog!" he joked back, standing up so he could brush the dog hair from his clothes. "Anyways, how do you feel today?"  
  
"Mixed. Matt, I was thinking and umm, I'm going to get professional help."  
  
"How do you mean?"  
  
"As from Saturday, I'm going to a clinic. I don't want to be ill anymore, I want to be better again and I'd be lying if I said that I'm going to get through my condition here."  
  
"Wow Ames. Well, I'll be here for you regardless. I'm glad you want help."  
  
~Friday Night~  
  
Amy stood at the foot of her bed, folding some clothes before placing them in her suitcase. Today, she was leaving for the clinic, only had another hour before going. Matt walked into the room and sat on the bed.  
  
"How long do you think you'll be gone for?" he asked, handing her a pile of t-shirts and a pair of baggy pants.  
  
"A few months is all I can say. It depends on when I'm better," she replied. After setting the last pieces of clothing in, she zipped up the suitcase and joined her best friend, sitting next to him. Taking his hand between hers, she said, "Matt, thanks for being there for me. You have no idea how much it means to me." They hugged tightly, both on the verge of tears. This was the last time they were going to properly see each other. Fair enough, he could visit, but it wouldn't be often with work schedules and all. Amy couldn't stop the tears and let them free-fall down her cheeks. Matt wiped them away with his sleeve then kissed her forehead. Grabbing her bag and jacket, they went down the stairs. She took one last look at the house before they left the house. She was going to say goodbye to Jeff, Shane, Shannon, Gil and Beth before actually leaving for the clinic.  
  
Once arriving at Jeff's house, she was immediately tackling by everyone pulling her into one huge hug. Matt laughed at the expression on her face, begging for help as they squeezed the air from her lungs! Finally, they all released her and sat down to talk for half an hour before Amy individually hugged everyone and said her goodbyes to everyone. Soon enough, her and Matt were on their way to the clinic, located in Tampa, Florida. They spent most of the night driving to their destination and finally arrived at 7am. They went for a quick bite to eat before making their way to the Hyde Park Counselling Centre.  
  
"Hello, how can I help you?" the receptionist asked politely.  
  
"I'm Amy Dumas, I rung up the other day. I have anorexia," she explained, feeling her eyes watering but fought against the tears. She felt Matt squeeze her hand consolingly. After talking with a few of the workers, they finally led Amy to her new accommodation. Matt went with her and sat on the cold bed with her. They both remained silent for a while before he kneeled in front of her.  
  
"I'm going to miss you," he began, "but anytime you need me, I'm just a phone call away. I'll visit you when I can."  
  
"Good," she laughed through tears. "You are the one thing that has kept me sane through all of this."  
  
"Who said you were still sane?" he joked, causing her to playfully slap him upside the head. "I'm only messing around. Well, I've got to go now. Get well Amy. Travelling won't be the same without you. Bye babe."  
  
"See you Matt. I'll miss you too." He bent down and hugged her closely before placing his lips to hers for a split second then leaving. Amy didn't know what to make of that kiss but watched him leave. She couldn't deny that that kiss sparked fireworks…  
  
TBC…  
  
Well, Chapter 10 is done!! The Next Chapter should be up within the next week for definite. :D Well, send feedback!!  
  
~Carly~ 


	11. Chapter 11

Hey guys, sorry it's been so long but last Monday I suffered a miscarriage with twins so it was a kind of double blow and I've just been really depressed lately. But anyways, here we are.  
  
Title: A Hunger For Perfection-Chapter 11. Author: Carly. Disclaimer: I don't own anyone involved in this story.  
  
~Three Months Later~ Roughly just over twelve weeks had passed since Amy had been in the centre. She was getting better and her weight was almost back to normal. The only problem was watching Raw and Smackdown each week, wishing she could've been in the ring too. The WWE had told the fans the truth, she had anorexia. Amy, or Lita to many, wasn't so perfect as a lot of people had believed she was. But they still sent her cards and presents and letters, all hoping for her to return soon. All of her friends had come to visit her at some point but not very often. Her only highlight of the day seemed her phone calls with Matt. He'd visit, with Jeff a lot of the times too, every fortnight on their days off. It was the one thing she'd like forward to. Sighing, Amy finished reading her book and lay further down on the bed. It was eleven o'clock at night and he still hadn't called. Matt had promised he'd call at nine but her cell had remained silent and when she had tried ringing instead, she only got his answering machine. But god, she was bored. Normally never going to until three in the morning, Amy didn't know what to do with herself. She'd showered, eaten and read an entire book. Just as she was about to drift off though, there was a quiet knocking at the door. "Hey Amy." "Hey guys, come in if you want," Amy replied. Her three mates entered the room and sat at the edge of the bed. Kayleigh, Jodie and Jenn were roughly the same age as her but still all a bit younger. She'd met them within the first week of her arrival. They'd become pretty good friends and Amy was thankful to be able to talk to someone about her anorexia. "So, what's up?"  
  
"Nothing much. You just seemed really down today. Wanted to see if you're okay?" Jodie asked, curiously. "I'm just fed up. I hate being stuck here. I want to go back to work, see my friends again. And Matt hasn't called tonight either." "Why don't you call him?" "I've tried, his voicemail service keeps coming on!" "Just out of curiosity, are you and Matt dating?" "No! We're just friends.but he did kiss me first night I arrived here, when he was saying goodbye. We haven't mentioned it. So I guess it doesn't mean anything." They all talked for a little while more before Amy grew extremely tired so her friends left her to sleep. But, she couldn't doze off; she had too many things on her mind. She just wanted her life back to normal. Instead, she was constantly watched over in case she exercised or made herself sick. Matt seemed to stop calling as much too, if he even did at all. At the start of her admittance, Matt would call everyday, sometimes even twice a day, just to see how she was. But gradually, his calls shortened as "something always came up". It wasn't long after that; he went through a day without calling her. And she missed him. Amy woke up the next morning, still exhausted. She'd finally managed to get some sleep but only for four hours. She quickly showered and changed before going into one of the rooms for breakfast. But she didn't feel much like eating today. It wasn't necessarily because she thought she would get fat, but she had so much running through her head, she didn't want to eat. But she had to. That was the rules. Amy grudgingly ate her food of a full English breakfast then went outside for some fresh air. Because she had been eating lately, the supervisors decided to let her have a bit a freedom seeing as she was a grown woman who they could now trust to get better. Amy watched as more anorexic girls and a few boys made their way to the entrance to get admitted, family and friends with them. It was hard to believe she used to be like that. But Amy was almost better. They had said if she kept up the way she was going, she'd be home in no time. And she couldn't wait. She could finally see her mom, Matt, Jeff, Gil and her dog again. Not to mention, go back to work. Weeks slipped by and Amy was getting stronger every day. When the doctors weighed her one day, she was now over a hundred pounds. They finally agreed to let her go, just as long as she kept in contact with a counsellor and doctor to check how she was doing. But she still had to reach at least a hundred and twenty pounds before she could start training as a wrestler again, to make sure her body was strong enough against the moves that were performed in the ring. Her bones had weakened slightly because of the anorexia but Amy's doctor was sure she'd be okay. She immediately scattered to her room to phone Matt and tell him the good news.even though she hadn't heard from him in over two weeks. Unfortunately, it was just his answer machine.again. "Umm, hey Matt, its me again. Please call me back; I need to talk to you. Bye," Amy said, half excited and half disappointed. She really wanted to talk to someone, so decided to ring Jeff instead. "Hello?" he asked in a tried voice. "Hey, Jeffrey!" Amy replied happily. "Ames? Hey Red, what's up?" "Nothing much but I have a surprise for you. You should be getting it very soon." "Can't you just tell me?" "No, that would ruin the surprise now wouldn't it? Listen, what's up with Matt? He never calls me anymore, and when I ring him, his voice mails always comes on." "I haven't seen him much either lately. I'll have a word with him later." They talked for another ten minuets before Jeff had to go for a meeting. It was nearing half-past twelve in the afternoon and Amy was allowed to leave that day. She grabbed her suitcase and began packing. Not bothering to fold everything neatly, she was so eager to leave, she threw her clothes in haphazardly. She jumped when Jodie and Kayleigh entered. Amy quickly explained they were letting her go as she continued to pack. They kept talking as she collected her toiletries and other belongings, jamming them into another smaller suitcase. As soon as she was finished, she fell to the bed and breathed out deeply. As they conversed, Jenn entered as well. After quarter of an hour, they swapped cell phone numbers and arranged to meet up sometime. They all still had quite a while to go so they wouldn't be leaving any time soon. Amy talked with the doctor and whomever else she needed to before finally exiting. She hugged her friends goodbye then climbed into the cab that would be taking her to the airport. After the two-hour flight, Amy landed in Ohio where Raw was being held. She grabbed another cab to a near-by hotel and checked in. She wasn't really used to flying as she always drove to her destinations, hence the reason why she had jet lag. The moment Amy entered her assigned hotel room, she collapsed on the bed for a well-deserved sleep. Later that afternoon, she decided to do some laundry. By now, at half past four, the wrestlers would be at the arena so there was a decreased chance of bumping into someone. After cleaning her clothes, she returned to her room to re-dye her fading red hair and get ready. At about six o'clock, she took another cab to the arena, ready to face her friends again even though she was still worried, deep down, they would think she'd put too much weight on. That fear would be with her for a while. But, she was ready for her normal life again and to see Matt and Jeff again. She just couldn't wait for whatever life brought her now, and was determined never to starve herself again. The End  
  
Expect a sequel very soon.until then, CYA!!  
  
~Carly~ 


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